I’m a Pirate Bear, carrying green roses and singing the theme song from CARS

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Pirate bearYes — these things are true — they must be because I learned these things about myself by taking numerous quizzes on Facebook.  I used to shy away from answering all of those stupid questions – but then my natural curiosity got the better of me (must be the bear part of my personality) – so I took one.  I wanted to know what my spirit animal was.  I was looking forward to confirming that I was a horse since I had always wanted to be that (see The Challenge of Daily Post) – so imagine my surprise when it turns out I’m actually a bear!  I wanted to be this sleek animal built for speed and instead I’m a giant walking fur coat!

Having had my eyes opened, I figured there was a lot more I needed to learn about myself so I continued to take the quizzes – hoping to find some insights into my life – since I apparently knew nothing at all about myself!  Next, I learned which constellation best represented me – hoping for Diana or Cassiopeia – but of course – what did I get?  The bear!  Was there a conspiracy on Facebook to give me an inferiority complex and force me to see myself as I really am — a large, furry beast?

No – I would not accept that – so I moved on to the next quiz — what was I in my past life.  This shouldn’t be bad – at least I knew there were no bears in the mix.  I’m thinking I should be an Indian princess or even a cowboy – so when a pirate came up in my past, I figured I could live with that.  At least I wasn’t a bear!

Now feeling a little vindicated I decided to find out what color rose I was and my theme song from a Disney movie.  It turns out I’m a green rose – whoever heard of a green rose?  I think that’s just Facebook’s way of either saying I’m so weird that a green rose fits me – or maybe I’m just so unique that a special green rose represent me.  As for the theme from CARS — well, if I’m going to be a pirate bear carrying green roses, I’m probably going to be in the circus – so that would make sense.

Today, I saw a quiz which would tell me which Disney mother I am most like.  I started thinking about all of the Disney mothers and I’m pretty sure I don’t want to take this quiz.  Bambi’s mother – dead.  Cinderella’s mother – dead.  Sleeping Beauty’s mother – in a coma, as good as dead.  Belle’s mother – dead.  Ariel’s mother – missing in action.  The only mother I can think of that I wouldn’t mind being is Merida’s mother – and of course – she’s a BEAR!

I guess I should just accept it – Facebook has decreed it — I am a BEAR!