Christmas 2002 – The Gurnetts (not to be confused with the Osbournes)


Happy Holidays from the Gurnetts!   Lately, I’ve been told that the only difference between our household and the Osbournes (aside from the mega bucks!) is the number of tattoos and piercings –I’m hoping that’s an exaggeration – Pat doesn’t shake like Ozzy or eat live chickens, and all of the children have normal colored hair!   This has been a year full of changes for our crazy bunch – Jenny graduated from beauty school, Bob graduated from high school, Tim got his driver’s license and Becky started high school.  Pat and I even got into the act – we bought a new car (a Saturn Vue) and I decided that after 19 years at Mutual of Omaha, all 4000 employees had heard all of my jokes and stories, so it was time to change jobs.  So, in April, I started working for Physician’s Mutual Insurance Company – now I have a whole new audience for the stories of my dysfunctional family.  Needless to say, with the job change, we didn’t go on vacation this summer, but saved it for Thanksgiving.  We visited my baby sister and her family in Alabama for the holiday and passed on some of our most obnoxious habits to her children – I wouldn’t want to deprive anyone of the experience of this bunch of lunatics!  Tim has managed to become the only one of our children to be stopped by the police in two states – he recently bought a 1974 Jeep CJ5 and the police stopped him twice in the first week because of his “in-transit” stickers – but that wasn’t enough, Tim decided to “roll through” a stop sign in Jacksonville, Alabama in front of a police officer.  Luckily, the officer felt sorry for Tim since he was from Nebraska and didn’t give him a ticket!  Tim and Pat did manage to go fishing a couple of days – didn’t catch anything except a cold this year – I’m surprised they didn’t lie and tell me they caught 135 fish – since I never see the darn things anyway – how would I know?

Jenny, age 20 (I know – no longer a teenager!), is waiting to take her boards for cosmetology.  After she takes that, she can get a job in a beauty salon.  She is taking classes in the meantime to learn about interior design and photography.  I expect to have the best looking head of hair and house in the state of Nebraska – in addition, our pictures should be published (maybe not, that would mean I would have to clean the house occasionally).

Bob, age 18, is attending University of Nebraska at Omaha.  He hasn’t decided on a major, heck he hasn’t decided if he even wants to attend classes on a regular basis.  I’m still expecting Bob to be a lawyer or go into politics (or both) since he has a habit of debating every issue TO DEATH!  Well, at least his hair will look good and Jenny can decorate the White House for him when he is elected President!

Tim, 16 years old and a junior in high school, is having a blast with his Jeep.  Whenever it gets above 30 degrees outside, he wants to take the top off – we’ve had to warn him about the dangers of not having any ears!  Tim is now the tallest person in the family (about 6’3”) and is still growing!  He is still active in Boy Scouts and this year is Senior Patrol Leader.

Becky, age 14, is a freshman in high school and trying to live down the legends of her older siblings.    She was on the volleyball team this fall and is now on the basketball team.  She is still playing the flute in the band also.  In addition, she helps Jenny teach Sunday School.  We are still trying find out when the child has time to breathe – much less eat and sleep.  However, she does manage to find time to be on the computer and the phone at the same time and talks for hours – so I think she is surviving just fine!

Pat and I are doing great.  The bathroom is coming along nicely – we actually have a new sink and floor – on to the finishing of the walls!  One of these years, I won’t have to write about how the bathroom is progressing – I might actually have to talk about something else.

We hope your holidays are full of love and kindness.  Remember to tell those you love, that you love them, and remind the kids that they have to pay for their own tattoos!



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